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Re: Humour

Posted: Tue Oct 08, 2024 10:54 am
by ReubenVP
Last night when I was drunk, I tried to impress my friends by swallowing a bunch of Scrabble tiles.


My next trip to the bathroom could spell disaster.

Re: Humour

Posted: Tue Oct 08, 2024 5:49 pm
by SteveB
Man: Doctor, I keep thinking I’m a dog.

Doctor: Ok, lie on the couch and tell me all about it.

Man: I’m not allowed on the couch.

Re: Humour

Posted: Thu Oct 10, 2024 9:07 am
by ReubenVP
The orchestra leader was hit by lightning.

Unfortunately they were a good conductor.

Re: Humour

Posted: Sun Oct 13, 2024 6:08 pm
by Johnny 216GSi
I've just got a job as a nursery rhyme cow.

I'm over the moon.

Re: Humour

Posted: Tue Oct 15, 2024 11:36 am
by ReubenVP
A pre-Halloween joke...


"OK, and what's the problem?"

"Well doctor, a wolf bit me."

"Where?"

"No, just an ordinary one."

Re: Humour

Posted: Thu Oct 17, 2024 9:52 am
by ReubenVP
My friend says I'm getting fat, but in my defence....


..I've had a lot on my plate recently.

Re: Humour

Posted: Mon Oct 21, 2024 11:51 am
by ReubenVP
Two trucks collided at the local railway bridge.... a Cadbury truck and a Lego truck.


It's choc a block.

Re: Humour

Posted: Wed Oct 23, 2024 10:21 am
by ReubenVP
I got an invitation to the local archaeology group for a leg bone party.

Should be quite a shindig.

Re: Humour

Posted: Wed Oct 23, 2024 11:13 am
by StubbornPatriot
The great thing about life insurance? You don't need to worry about losing your no claims bonus.

Re: Humour

Posted: Fri Oct 25, 2024 10:08 am
by ReubenVP
I went to the doctor and said I thought I'd broken my arm in two places, they had a go at me and said to me...

just don't go to those places anymore!